Customers are a symptom of a horrible horrible disease called Retail.

Now, for people who didn't know this, I work retail, yes, retail. It's not all that fun. First, you have to deal with the customers every whim, you can't leave, even 30 minutes after the store was closed, until every customer is vacated from the premises, and generally customers don't know jack. Also, they're a bunch of brainless zombies with no respect for the employees there. Okay, not ALL of them, but a good majority.
You deal with the people that don't respect you, the people who are 100% positive they know the price better than you, even though you put the sign up all of 30 seconds ago, and they're smarter than you, and you're uneducated mass working whatever shift you're needed for on that particular day.
First of all, you're completely incorrect, honestly? I probably know a lot more than the brainless gobs who act like that. Just because you can add and subtract anything with less that 3 digits in your head, doesn't make you smarter than me, considering I know (having been employed there for a few years) the precise location of the vast majority of products in the store.
Trust me, this has been tested and proven.
Today, having not worked a closing shift on a Friday in who-knows-how-long, I learned that theres a certain lady who likes coming in just before closing, filling up a cart with a large selection of groceries, and then going through the express lane rather than a regular lane, just because she wants a $1 scratch lotto.
IS IT SO HARD, especially when paying cash, TO GO THROUGH A REGULAR LANE, AND THAN GO TO THE EXPRESS LANE TO GET YOUR SINGLE $1 SCRATCH LOTTO TICKET, OR, HEAVEN FORBID, ASK THE REGULAR LANE CASHIER TO GRAB THAT LOTTO TICKET FOR YOU? Probably not.
So at about 20 minutes after shut down, we finally start doing our cashier closing, and realize, said woman, had a leaking package of meat, and left us a bloody mess AAALLLLLL over the floor to clean up.
Thanks...
Thanks a lot...
So finally, I get away, and we start heading home, I'm still a little hot headed about the incident, but otherwise, calmed down. And now, I'm going to wait for my mother to finish putting Siblings to bed, and play some Halo: Combat Evolved with her, and maybe show off the ending of Dragon Age, now that I finished it properly.

That's what I said.

"What was that for?"
"Because you have always been so kind to me, and I won't be seeing you again since I'm killing myself once we reach the honeymoon suite."
"Won't that be nice. She kissed me."